Hi all,
It's been a wild few months for our family.
I like my job; if not, something would have snapped a long time ago. Christian likes school, and El Guapo smiles when he sees his daycare in the morning. Christian has been able to keep his two languages apart, so he is now officially bilingual. El Guapo not so much. He shouts out commands in Danish, peppered with a few No's and Thank You's.
The Girl has been more away than home, so that's taking a toll on everyone. Going to interviews for residency is exciting, when you are a senior medical student. I think she is excited, sure, but mostly she wants the process over and her name in a great program.
Which brings me to the tragedy that is my life. The big kids only come up to visit every four weeks. I miss them terribly, especially Natali. I don't miss living in Denmark particularly. Well, no, I am actually surprised by how much I miss Denmark, but it's something I can live with. What I really miss is being with Natali. I miss cleaning the kitchen after the boys are asleep, while she plays her guitar for me. I miss her quirky opinions on everything.
She has really shut me out. Not that I would know for sure, but I think she is strugglng hard to find her place in cutthroat middle school. Her focus is on getting good grades, stayng skinny (too much focus on that) and becoming popular. Seeing me is is not a distraction from this life, as much as a setback. My ex wife is not making this easy, either, but she has her own stressors (again, not that I really know).
It just hurts to think about that just 6 months ago, I would wake her up in the morning, find her favorite clothes from the (usually clean) laundry, discuss her day and her problems until the moment she would fall asleep. It was probably the part of my life. I say probably, because I really have no idea. If I suddenly had to live without the Girl or one of the boys, it might be even worse.
The Girl applied to programs mainly in the midwest and then a few very prestigious programs on the coasts. Everyne does that, thinking "wow, what if I got an interview at Johns Hopkins". It looked like I was finally going to live close to the kids. Her programs included University of Wisconsin and Medical College of Wisconsin, her two alma maters.
But it wouldn't be my life, if things were that simple. These relatively "easy" programs have not offered her interviews. But all the "hey, let's appply there" programs on the coasts have invited her. Her list of interviews includes all the PM&R powerhouses. We are not sure why it''s so, but we imagine her research background is a bigger plus at the top programs. But only one that would bring the world's fastest hematologist closer to his kids. That one is University of Minnesota.
Her match is March 12th. We are very, very nervous about it. You have to go where the Match tells you.
Thursday, December 19, 2013
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
I'm racing again!
Life has been hectic, to say the least. The running has been great. We are still exploring Duluth's many trails.
The Girl ran (and won) the Superior Sawtooth 50 mile race. She will have a report up soon, I think. I had to work, unfortunately, but it sounds like a fun race. Alicia, who is an expert of extreme ultras, has her report here. She has the Arrowhead 135 Mile women's record and fastest known time on the entire 442 km Superior Hiking Trail (although I believe the trail was a little shorter when she set the record).
The Girl's win was a pleasant surprise, although not completely unexpected. She also set a PR of 18:49 at a 5K in Oconomowoc. In running, you can't compare the quality of two such efforts, but an 18:49 is quite an achievement. In this day and age, where longer always seems to be better, a lot of even semi-serious runners are not familar with quality times in the classic long distances. Well, 18:49 is fast. And I believe she will improve from there. She is running interval times indicating low 18s.
I ran a 16:11 at the same race, so I'm getting into decent shape. The race consisted of long, boring straights of asphalt with a few hills. Yes, boring.
Last Wednesday, I got to run a trail race in Lester Park. It's part of a trail series in and around Duluth that lasts all fall. There are races almost every week, actually. It's been a long time since I had so much fun racing. It's 3 loops of mildly technical trails with lots of ups and downs. Each loop goes mostly up for a mile and then back down for another mile.
The warm-up area teemed with fast-looking younger men. A few guys ran in spikes! Many ran shirtless, which is always certain to make me feel old. My hairy, pale torso is not and never will be acceptable for public display.
What a cool race. Up and down, twists and turns; never a dull moment. I felt ok on the climbs and had a hard time holding on on the downhills. That's always the case with me.
Coming through after lap 1:
That's Chris Rubesch, who is a top ultra runner. Chris played no tactical games and just ran his own race, leading out the pack the first mile. The eventual winner, Gage and Adam are up ahead.
After lap 2:
We had caught Adam. The three of us ran a lap together..
And at the finish: (not exactly a toe striker, eh?):
I was able to sneak away on the last long uphill. And by sneak away, I mean red-lining it, while my legs were simultaneously numb and burning with lactic acid. When I got to the top, I had maybe 20 seconds on Chris and Adam (and at this time Erik Elmstrand was catching them). The downhill was a crazy all-out sprint, hoping to stay on my feet. Thankfully, they didn't catch me. Results here. Did I mention it was a fun race? Tomorrow is the next race in the series. Since the Girl is still sore from her 50 miler, she will watch the kids and I get to run this one, too!
I should write about Christian starting school and Mattias saying "Mommy" for the first time, but that's another time and another post.
The Girl ran (and won) the Superior Sawtooth 50 mile race. She will have a report up soon, I think. I had to work, unfortunately, but it sounds like a fun race. Alicia, who is an expert of extreme ultras, has her report here. She has the Arrowhead 135 Mile women's record and fastest known time on the entire 442 km Superior Hiking Trail (although I believe the trail was a little shorter when she set the record).
The Girl's win was a pleasant surprise, although not completely unexpected. She also set a PR of 18:49 at a 5K in Oconomowoc. In running, you can't compare the quality of two such efforts, but an 18:49 is quite an achievement. In this day and age, where longer always seems to be better, a lot of even semi-serious runners are not familar with quality times in the classic long distances. Well, 18:49 is fast. And I believe she will improve from there. She is running interval times indicating low 18s.
I ran a 16:11 at the same race, so I'm getting into decent shape. The race consisted of long, boring straights of asphalt with a few hills. Yes, boring.
Last Wednesday, I got to run a trail race in Lester Park. It's part of a trail series in and around Duluth that lasts all fall. There are races almost every week, actually. It's been a long time since I had so much fun racing. It's 3 loops of mildly technical trails with lots of ups and downs. Each loop goes mostly up for a mile and then back down for another mile.
The warm-up area teemed with fast-looking younger men. A few guys ran in spikes! Many ran shirtless, which is always certain to make me feel old. My hairy, pale torso is not and never will be acceptable for public display.
What a cool race. Up and down, twists and turns; never a dull moment. I felt ok on the climbs and had a hard time holding on on the downhills. That's always the case with me.
Coming through after lap 1:
That's Chris Rubesch, who is a top ultra runner. Chris played no tactical games and just ran his own race, leading out the pack the first mile. The eventual winner, Gage and Adam are up ahead.
After lap 2:
We had caught Adam. The three of us ran a lap together..
And at the finish: (not exactly a toe striker, eh?):
I was able to sneak away on the last long uphill. And by sneak away, I mean red-lining it, while my legs were simultaneously numb and burning with lactic acid. When I got to the top, I had maybe 20 seconds on Chris and Adam (and at this time Erik Elmstrand was catching them). The downhill was a crazy all-out sprint, hoping to stay on my feet. Thankfully, they didn't catch me. Results here. Did I mention it was a fun race? Tomorrow is the next race in the series. Since the Girl is still sore from her 50 miler, she will watch the kids and I get to run this one, too!
I should write about Christian starting school and Mattias saying "Mommy" for the first time, but that's another time and another post.
Saturday, August 24, 2013
July 2013 Running Log
Not sure of the first part.
8 Long run on trails
10 Hilly run in Willingen, Germany. Then a jog with my brother.
12 Gorgeous mountain run in Kappl. Maybe 20K
13 6K hill climb before hiking with the fam
14 Another mountain run, around 20K
15 10K downhill run mountain after getting lost hiking
17
Ran a lot of perimeter
Not sure of the rest. Mostly unstructured fartlek-type stuff on trails.
8 Long run on trails
10 Hilly run in Willingen, Germany. Then a jog with my brother.
12 Gorgeous mountain run in Kappl. Maybe 20K
13 6K hill climb before hiking with the fam
14 Another mountain run, around 20K
15 10K downhill run mountain after getting lost hiking
17
Ran a lot of perimeter
Not sure of the rest. Mostly unstructured fartlek-type stuff on trails.
Monday, August 19, 2013
Winforce 100K - Race Report
The Girl was volunteering as race doctor, which got me in for free. Winforce 100 is a very hilly, but mostly non-technical trail race. A 50K on that course would fit me very well. Next year, Christian Madsen, the RD, may add a 50K option. This year, for me, it was running the race or watching the kids all day, so I figured I would run 2 or 3 laps.
The route is 4 gorgeous loops of 25K. They Girl ran the first loop with me, before tending to potential heart attacks and what not. The course starts out with a difficult 2K on the beach, through dunes, seaweed etc.
Then it opens up into a nice, albeit windy, 3K section along the ocean. It's a little sandy on this section but otherwise quite runnable. After this, one gets 5K of very runnable forest singletrack. Then a long section of "Scotland", ie. hills and more hills with sheep and ocean vistas. There are two short out-and-backs, which is really nice. It doesn't feel as lonely as some ultras.
Did we start out slowly? It's hard to say, as everyone ran severely positive splits. We ran the first 25K in 2:30, somewhere in the middle of the pack. That pace, ie. 10 hour pace, would easily have won the race, even though it felt desperately slow compared to the front runners. So I don't know; how does one race an ultra? Do you take walking breaks, even when your legs are fresh? Do you slow down to below comfortable cruising pace?
On the second loop, I started moving up through the field. Or rather, people started coming back to me. I may have run a little faster on the second loop, but not much. By the end of the second loop (50K in a little less than 5 hours, I think), I felt really good.
I hadn't really expected that I would run the 100K but at the halfway point, I felt very good and was even considering my chances of finishing on the podium. The Girl was telling me how good I looked and seemed genuinely excited to see me do well. At 55K, I was in third place with music playing and emotions running high. I ran all the runnable stuff fairly fast.
Then things started to unravel. The sun had come out and it was getting really hot. I started to feel nauseated and dizzy. I thought seriously about trying to throw up, but I didn't want to lose the fluids, and I didn't think it would make me feel better. It seems like the stars of ultrarunning can throw up at will; maybe that's something I have to work on.
Anyway. I have never felt that miserable in a race. I have sucked at ultras many times, but it's always been my legs. I have gotten used to feeling relatively fresh until my legs suddenly cramp up. Kind of like relaxing in your car and suddenly you have a flat tire. Saturday was different. I felt so sick and miserable, whereas my legs felt fairly good. A few times, I had the wherewithal to ask of myself why exactly I couldn't just run faster (to get it it over with, I guess), and the answer was simply that I felt more sick, dizzy and disoriented every time I sped up. At 65K or so, I was passed by Maibritt, who would later win for the women. She told me she felt horrible, and I figured I could tag onto her for a while.
I would run an inner data analysis to figure out just why it felt so bad to run her pace. We were probably going 10 minute miles or slower, but I just couldn't hang on. Gawd, I felt bad.
At 70K, I asked Moses Lovstad, of Danish trail running fame, how to deal with nausea. His official answer was "Coke works for everything", but the way he looked at me, his real answer read more like "drop out and go sit in the shade for a while".
When I got in after the third lap, I still thought about continuing. I was in third place for the men and fourth place overall, and rumor had it there were decent prizes for top 3. The race doctor paid me some special attention and I drank maybe 2 liters of Coke. I didn't feel any better. I sat for a while contemplating my options, when the fourth place guy, Fabricio, came in. He looked very smooth and composed, and it felt like there was no way in the universe I could keep up with him.
So I dropped out. And good thing I did, because the next 3 hours were spent sitting miserably in the car, sometimes sleeping for a few minutes, sometimes debating whether I could open the door and lean out before throwing up.
What a miserable experience.
I don't know why I keep trying these ultras. I have promised myself that I won't run another ultra (50Ks don't count, of course) until Voyageur next year.
A big thanks to Christian Madsen for making a race like this happen. I would recommend this race to everyone. I was impressed at how he seemed to know exactly where the runners were on the course, especially after nightfall, when the field was so spread out. The course markings were excellent, especially considering the two potentially confusing out-and-backs.
The route is 4 gorgeous loops of 25K. They Girl ran the first loop with me, before tending to potential heart attacks and what not. The course starts out with a difficult 2K on the beach, through dunes, seaweed etc.
Then it opens up into a nice, albeit windy, 3K section along the ocean. It's a little sandy on this section but otherwise quite runnable. After this, one gets 5K of very runnable forest singletrack. Then a long section of "Scotland", ie. hills and more hills with sheep and ocean vistas. There are two short out-and-backs, which is really nice. It doesn't feel as lonely as some ultras.
Did we start out slowly? It's hard to say, as everyone ran severely positive splits. We ran the first 25K in 2:30, somewhere in the middle of the pack. That pace, ie. 10 hour pace, would easily have won the race, even though it felt desperately slow compared to the front runners. So I don't know; how does one race an ultra? Do you take walking breaks, even when your legs are fresh? Do you slow down to below comfortable cruising pace?
On the second loop, I started moving up through the field. Or rather, people started coming back to me. I may have run a little faster on the second loop, but not much. By the end of the second loop (50K in a little less than 5 hours, I think), I felt really good.
I hadn't really expected that I would run the 100K but at the halfway point, I felt very good and was even considering my chances of finishing on the podium. The Girl was telling me how good I looked and seemed genuinely excited to see me do well. At 55K, I was in third place with music playing and emotions running high. I ran all the runnable stuff fairly fast.
Then things started to unravel. The sun had come out and it was getting really hot. I started to feel nauseated and dizzy. I thought seriously about trying to throw up, but I didn't want to lose the fluids, and I didn't think it would make me feel better. It seems like the stars of ultrarunning can throw up at will; maybe that's something I have to work on.
Anyway. I have never felt that miserable in a race. I have sucked at ultras many times, but it's always been my legs. I have gotten used to feeling relatively fresh until my legs suddenly cramp up. Kind of like relaxing in your car and suddenly you have a flat tire. Saturday was different. I felt so sick and miserable, whereas my legs felt fairly good. A few times, I had the wherewithal to ask of myself why exactly I couldn't just run faster (to get it it over with, I guess), and the answer was simply that I felt more sick, dizzy and disoriented every time I sped up. At 65K or so, I was passed by Maibritt, who would later win for the women. She told me she felt horrible, and I figured I could tag onto her for a while.
I would run an inner data analysis to figure out just why it felt so bad to run her pace. We were probably going 10 minute miles or slower, but I just couldn't hang on. Gawd, I felt bad.
At 70K, I asked Moses Lovstad, of Danish trail running fame, how to deal with nausea. His official answer was "Coke works for everything", but the way he looked at me, his real answer read more like "drop out and go sit in the shade for a while".
When I got in after the third lap, I still thought about continuing. I was in third place for the men and fourth place overall, and rumor had it there were decent prizes for top 3. The race doctor paid me some special attention and I drank maybe 2 liters of Coke. I didn't feel any better. I sat for a while contemplating my options, when the fourth place guy, Fabricio, came in. He looked very smooth and composed, and it felt like there was no way in the universe I could keep up with him.
So I dropped out. And good thing I did, because the next 3 hours were spent sitting miserably in the car, sometimes sleeping for a few minutes, sometimes debating whether I could open the door and lean out before throwing up.
What a miserable experience.
I don't know why I keep trying these ultras. I have promised myself that I won't run another ultra (50Ks don't count, of course) until Voyageur next year.
A big thanks to Christian Madsen for making a race like this happen. I would recommend this race to everyone. I was impressed at how he seemed to know exactly where the runners were on the course, especially after nightfall, when the field was so spread out. The course markings were excellent, especially considering the two potentially confusing out-and-backs.
Saturday, July 27, 2013
June Running Log
1-3 Something in Chicago
4 Checking out Duluth. 20K, some in Chester Park. Good stuff.
5: Two runs, maybe 8K total around Duluth
7: 6K with Andreas on bike trails
9: 1.5 hours in Hixon and HPT. Yes!
12: 2 hours on HPT. Yes!
13-17: Can't remember.
18: Two Suså loops. Felt tired.
20: Quick break from watching kids. 10 x pinetum in 20:40. Not bad at all, actually. I think 12 seconds off PR
22: 45 minutes with the boys and then 3x perimeter loop. Thanks, Natti!
23 Lots of running with the turds in the jogger. Maybe total 16K
25: 3 x perimeter loop fast.
Don't remember the rest
4 Checking out Duluth. 20K, some in Chester Park. Good stuff.
5: Two runs, maybe 8K total around Duluth
7: 6K with Andreas on bike trails
9: 1.5 hours in Hixon and HPT. Yes!
12: 2 hours on HPT. Yes!
13-17: Can't remember.
18: Two Suså loops. Felt tired.
20: Quick break from watching kids. 10 x pinetum in 20:40. Not bad at all, actually. I think 12 seconds off PR
22: 45 minutes with the boys and then 3x perimeter loop. Thanks, Natti!
23 Lots of running with the turds in the jogger. Maybe total 16K
25: 3 x perimeter loop fast.
Don't remember the rest
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
How do single parents do it?
I'm coming up on two weeks of being alone with the kids. Natali is 12 and is a great help, so she doesn't really count as a kid, but the boys are 1 and 5, so they almost count for three kids.
Oh. My. God. What gets me the most is that I am "on call" 24-7. When El Guapo wakes up and wanders around the apartment in the middle of the night; when he poops in the tub; when Christian pours a cup of sand onto the floor from his shoes; when they are thirsty, hungry, sad, tired. When they miss their mom.
My mom has come by a few times to help, and Natali is a great support. With them, it's a very unenviable life, and without them, barely feasible. I have worked with colleagues, doctors and otherwise, who are single parents, and they tend to have lots and lots of sick days. I fully understand why. There is just no respite from single parenthood.
At night, when it's all over and the kids are sleeping like little angels, I stand there for a while and congratulate myself on making it through another day. Then I cross off an imaginary day on the countown-to-the-Girl calendar. And then I sneak off to pick up the apartment, fill the dishwasher, fold laundry, write a few emails. When I get back to bed, the little slugs have rotated 1200 degrees around the bed. Picking them up is like lifting anti-matter. If I am able to push them apart, they slither back toward the center of the bed like heat-seeking missiles. I end up squeezing myself in between the two pink, mouth-breathing eels.
But it's not all bad. Christian has, surprisingly, stepped up to the situation. He gets up first thing in the morning; not after encouragement followed by orders, followed by screaming, followed by poking, followed by carrying a newly caught Alaskan salmon out of the bed. No, he gets up and walks into the bathroom to have his teeth brushed. It's like he knows I'm stressed out and that messing with me is not a good idea.
Then, he carries the two Nutella rolls down to the bike trailer and feeds one to Mattias. He even makes sure Mattias doesn't drop the roll. At night, he behaves really well and had helped me scold Mattias a few times. I am very impressed.
Meanwhile, Natali is going through emotional hell. It's her last week in school, so she is saying goodbye to her friends of four years. She is most likely never coming back here, and up until lately, she pretended to be fine with that. Then a few nights ago, she said that coming back here for 7th grade wouldn't be too bad. Of course she is nervous; she is starting middle school in La Crosse in two months, poor thing. She is saying goodbye to her entire life here. Her cavelike room, with her guitar, drawings and Beatles posters, is forever to be abandoned.
I struggle with this. Being around Natti every day speaks to me on such a deep primate level. Seeing the world through her eyes is such a privilege; I am 100% in denial of the fact that it's coming to an end.
Moving to Duluth is exciting, of course. Make no mistake. I found a good job there. Nay, a great job, that I can't wait to start. I have always loved Duluth and the thought of starting a life from scratch there is tantalizing.
Two more months and it's for real. For good and for bad.
Oh. My. God. What gets me the most is that I am "on call" 24-7. When El Guapo wakes up and wanders around the apartment in the middle of the night; when he poops in the tub; when Christian pours a cup of sand onto the floor from his shoes; when they are thirsty, hungry, sad, tired. When they miss their mom.
My mom has come by a few times to help, and Natali is a great support. With them, it's a very unenviable life, and without them, barely feasible. I have worked with colleagues, doctors and otherwise, who are single parents, and they tend to have lots and lots of sick days. I fully understand why. There is just no respite from single parenthood.
At night, when it's all over and the kids are sleeping like little angels, I stand there for a while and congratulate myself on making it through another day. Then I cross off an imaginary day on the countown-to-the-Girl calendar. And then I sneak off to pick up the apartment, fill the dishwasher, fold laundry, write a few emails. When I get back to bed, the little slugs have rotated 1200 degrees around the bed. Picking them up is like lifting anti-matter. If I am able to push them apart, they slither back toward the center of the bed like heat-seeking missiles. I end up squeezing myself in between the two pink, mouth-breathing eels.
But it's not all bad. Christian has, surprisingly, stepped up to the situation. He gets up first thing in the morning; not after encouragement followed by orders, followed by screaming, followed by poking, followed by carrying a newly caught Alaskan salmon out of the bed. No, he gets up and walks into the bathroom to have his teeth brushed. It's like he knows I'm stressed out and that messing with me is not a good idea.
Then, he carries the two Nutella rolls down to the bike trailer and feeds one to Mattias. He even makes sure Mattias doesn't drop the roll. At night, he behaves really well and had helped me scold Mattias a few times. I am very impressed.
Meanwhile, Natali is going through emotional hell. It's her last week in school, so she is saying goodbye to her friends of four years. She is most likely never coming back here, and up until lately, she pretended to be fine with that. Then a few nights ago, she said that coming back here for 7th grade wouldn't be too bad. Of course she is nervous; she is starting middle school in La Crosse in two months, poor thing. She is saying goodbye to her entire life here. Her cavelike room, with her guitar, drawings and Beatles posters, is forever to be abandoned.
I struggle with this. Being around Natti every day speaks to me on such a deep primate level. Seeing the world through her eyes is such a privilege; I am 100% in denial of the fact that it's coming to an end.
Moving to Duluth is exciting, of course. Make no mistake. I found a good job there. Nay, a great job, that I can't wait to start. I have always loved Duluth and the thought of starting a life from scratch there is tantalizing.
Two more months and it's for real. For good and for bad.
May 2013 Running Log
1: Not sure
3: Not sure
5: Faxeløbet, 8.4K. First place.
7: Perimeter trail
8: Slow spin
9: 100K bike ride.
10: 10K running back and forth. 4 of those with Natti.
11: Half Ironman Mallorca. Another 8K jog, half with Natti.
12: Slow spin with the Girl. Water park fun.
13: 150K mountain ride. 4K with Natti.
14: 80K mountain ride. 4K with Natti.
16: 12K in woods. Heavy, weird feeling legs.
18: Long run in woods. Felt good.
19: 3K with Natti, Chooey and my dad.
20: 25K: 10K with the boys in the jogger. Then 2 perimeter loops and 5 hill loops. Great legs.
22: Horrible rain. 3 miles on the treadmill fast. Then 8K in the woods, moderate pace. Felt a little worn.
23: 5K with the boys in the jogger
24: 5K with the boys in the jogger
26: Intervals pacing the Girl through 5 x 1000m
27: 7K around North Lake
28: 12K slow Chicago Lakefront
30: 16K Chicago Lakefront
3: Not sure
5: Faxeløbet, 8.4K. First place.
7: Perimeter trail
8: Slow spin
9: 100K bike ride.
10: 10K running back and forth. 4 of those with Natti.
11: Half Ironman Mallorca. Another 8K jog, half with Natti.
12: Slow spin with the Girl. Water park fun.
13: 150K mountain ride. 4K with Natti.
14: 80K mountain ride. 4K with Natti.
16: 12K in woods. Heavy, weird feeling legs.
18: Long run in woods. Felt good.
19: 3K with Natti, Chooey and my dad.
20: 25K: 10K with the boys in the jogger. Then 2 perimeter loops and 5 hill loops. Great legs.
22: Horrible rain. 3 miles on the treadmill fast. Then 8K in the woods, moderate pace. Felt a little worn.
23: 5K with the boys in the jogger
24: 5K with the boys in the jogger
26: Intervals pacing the Girl through 5 x 1000m
27: 7K around North Lake
28: 12K slow Chicago Lakefront
30: 16K Chicago Lakefront
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
